Have to fly out for a bachelor party over Memorial Day weekend. Airfare is $800+ from my hometown which is ridiculous. Might spend a minimum of $1,500 that weekend.

Have to fly back out for the wedding a week later. Airfare is $470ish which is more reasonable than before. No hotels required but have to get a tux (wedding party), gift, etc. Might spend a minimum of $1,000 that weekend.

Would it be a douche move if I (groomsman) skip the bachelor party and only attend the wedding? I can't stomach the thought of spending $2.5K for my friend's wedding. Would love to use my miles for my airfare to attend the bachelor party but since it's a holiday weekend that isn't possible unless I use a ridiculous amount...Sadly, I didn't learn my lesson after being a groomsmen for another wedding.

 

Does your buddy live in Vegas? It seems a bit much to ask people to fly out twice in a month. I got married there and being from the east coast, I was thrilled whoever made it out. I didn't hold it against them. My bachelor party was semi locally in AC.

 

Midwest. Both events are in the Midwest while I'm located in West Coast.

 

I misunderstood. Thought it was all happening in Vegas.
Unless you have other connections to the random midwest city, hell no. Not a douche move at all skipping bachelor party.

 

I would say that if you are a close enough friend to be in the wedding party, you should attend both events, and just suck up the cost as the price of friendship

 

Yeah if you're not in town just flying in for the wedding is more than enough.

 

For me it's a matter of afford versus cheapness. I hate to say that I am agreeing with wigwam that if you have the cash to spend and it won't have an effect then go. If it strains things financially then don't. If this person is a true friend and assuming they are if you're in their wedding party, then they would understand.

I will say this though. I've been to a few bachelor parties in Vegas, including my own (22 person, gong show of a weekend) and you can't put a price on the memories built among friends. As they said on the hangover to a night we will never remember, but the four of us will never forget.